How to avoid being the "other woman"
Unfortunately, there are men out there who cannot, for whatever reason, stay faithful to their wives. No matter how you attempt to dissuade their advances, it becomes evident that their interest will not soon be put aside. Having been in this situation on more than on occasion, I've come to realize the signs of what could possibly turn into an ugly mess. In the beginning, the man will make a valiant effort to befriend you & gain your trust. He'll work his power of persuasion, usually lying terribly about his unloving relationship with his wife, to tear down the barrier of resistance, thus gaining access to our emotions. As women, we all know that letting our emotions make our decisions is a dangerous avenue, regardless of the situation. In this case, the man then begins to lay on the charm; reassuring you of his affection, constantly complimenting your looks in ways that make you feel safe in his presence. Ladies this is a VERY sneaky tactic, and don't be thrown off guard by his persistence; he'll play this game for as long as it takes for you to toy with the idea that, "it's ok; he's just a friend." HE'S NOT!! Just as you begin to open up to him, he moves in for the kill; telling you all the while that he's about to leave his wife, or that she hates him & doesn't appreciate all that he does for her. Men love to play the pity card. While all of this is going on, the wife generally has no clue that her man is soliciting sexual relations with another woman; it's especially undetected if you KNOW his wife. Once she gets a whif, your life may seriously be in danger, depending on the temperment of the wife.
So: to avoid such unwanted attention, you must first recognize the boundaries. Married men have no business wanting to be friends & go places alone with a single woman; especially when his wife is unaware of their "outings". If he calls you, HANG UP or don't answer. Go immediately to the wife & let her know what he's trying to pull. This could save your reputation and an ugly drama scene later on down the road. If he refuses to stop calling, alert the authorities & get a restraining order if necessary. Be aware of the early signs: Excessive friendliness, flirtation, comments of an unhappy marriage, requests to go somewhere alone, overly aggressive physical attention... Stop it before it starts. It all starts as a thought... Don't allow yourself to believe that this man is actually interested for any other reason than to get in your pants. He's not leaving his wife, nor should he. You can find a perfectly amazing man all on your own; you don't need someone else's hand-me-downs. :) Above all, respect yourselves ladies. Don't fall for their lame lines & promises they never intend on keeping. We deserve greatness; accept nothing less. :)
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Last Updated : Apr 30, 2008
